Star Wars: The Force Awakens – Teaser Breakdown

The new Star Wars teaser is out! It is exciting, brief, somewhat conflicting, mysterious – as all J.J. Abrams trailers are – and very, very interesting.

Watch it here, and let’s break it down:

(or click here if the embed doesn’t work)

We start with an obvious homage to THE GOOD, THE BAD AND THE UGLY, opening on a desert landscape when suddenly UP POPS SOME RANDOM GUY (John Boyega) in storm trooper armour! Whoa! Didn’t see that coming… clever, J.J., you’re so subtle.

Then we get a droid on a volleyball making droid noises and stuff.

New stormtrooper helmets! And guns! And they’re unloading off a ship into a city? I think it’s a city, but landing gear!

Then Daisy Ridley riding a speeder on what is probably Tatooine, but could be some other desert planet (although if I know Abrams, it’ll be Tatooine in some brief subplot). This remains to be seen, but Ridley looks like she will be the best part of this movie. Her speeder looks more like it was built in the 50s because the engine is three times the size of the rest of the craft, but I’m no physicist, so maybe that’s how things work in this universe. Smartphones be damned, bigger is better.

Suddenly, a wild Oscar Isaac appears! Full on rebel, X-wing pilot gear, with X-wings flying low over the water like the badass space crafts they are.

Also, the obligatory lens flares are here, but definitely not as apparent in Abrams’ entire filmography, so that’s a good sign.

And then….

then, my friends…

A SITH LORD!!!!

You know he’s a Sith because he’s wearing a black cloak and walking like he owns the place. But also because he has a TRI-LIGHTSABER!!!!!

BAD-ASS!!!!

And yet super lame at the same time. Seriously, a tri-saber? Really? I don’t know how I feel about this, I mean it looks cool, but it’s so damn impractical – at least Darth Maul’s double-saber made sense and actually had some weaponry use.

Let’s face it, this one just looks like it’s shooting flames out the side for no other reason than to shoot flames out the side and pose a definite hazard to its user. This doesn’t bode well as it is symptomatic of Abrams’ biggest flaw – he thinks he’s cool. His biggest issue is that he tries so hard to be cool – like a highschool rebel who discovered cigarettes and leather jackets but really just wants to belong – when really, he should be acting like a grown up and crafting some drama for us to care about. It’s just spectacle.

Anyways, is this Adam Driver? By the way he walks, I’d place my bets that it is – also by the super obvious way Abrams “hides” who the villain is even though we all know it (remember when Benedict Cumberbatch “wasn’t” Khan?).

But it is cool in the teaser. Super cool in the teaser.

THE MILLENNIUM FALCON!!!!!! FLYING IN A SUPER TWISTY PANNING SHOT AND SHOOTING TIE-FIGHTERS!!! AHHHHH!!!!!

The nerd in me rejoices so much!

This is definitely the coolest part of the teaser. Definitely. The Millennium Falcon is by far the coolest ship in the Star Wars Universe and it’s awesome to see it again after a long absence.

And titles.

DECEMBER 2015.

Mark your calendars.

 

Also for the whole teaser there’s some guy with a super awesome scary deep voice – probably a Sith – talking about the dark side of the force and stuff but honestly I’m not really listening because the images are so cool and besides, THEME MUSIC!!!!

 

So that’s the first teaser for Star Wars: The Force Awakens. I’m still not entirely on board with this title, but it’s warming on me, and from the first teaser I’m a lot more optimistic than I was when Abrams first signed on. I think he’ll do a decent job at the worst, and maybe he’ll pull this one off just fine. As long as the script is solid – the cast is incredible – he won’t mess it up, so here’s hoping.

What did you think?

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2 comments

  1. I’m a Star Trek guy. I really liked Abrams’s “Star Trek Into Darkness” (2013) – how it was shot…blah, blah, blah. I’ve watched the “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” trailer multiple times, something I don’t usually do, and like you the nerd in me went crazy.

    Like

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